High Stress and Being All Things for All People
Are you feeling stressed these days? One of the key influences to high stress is from trying to be – “All Things for All People.”
This condition is a stress creating machine for those who have it. In fact, it is so common we have found it or identified it from our basic assessment tools. When people have this condition it shows up in their adapted behavior, which indicts the person has little internal identify and attempts to make everyone happy – but themselves.
This unique finding has allowed us to either assist the person with the condition (it is not fatal unless it leads to a stress related health condition.) or advise their manager with a simple solution.
The simple solution to this condition is to learn exactly what your priorities are and then focus your performance strictly on the highest priorities. This is a simple solution, yet is hard to execute for the person who is addicted to helping others even to their own detriment. Here’s the key – you are of little value to others if you are head over heals in stress!
Stress usually eliminates or reduces the ability to remain calm during periods of crisis. This is the exact time true leaders step up, remain calm and are able to make excellent decisions to solve or reduce the crisis. The high stress people are usually found running around, losing focus, sometimes looking for someone or something to blame for the crisis, and are difficult to be around during this time period.
If you feel like you may be stressed, check your current state of mind. Is is focused only upon others and what you can do for them? Or, are you focused upon the really important priorities in your life or business? Focus upon what has to get done is more important than focusing upon how to help everyone around you. The first part is about achievement and the self esteem that comes with performance. The second is all about either being liked, or getting a feeling of value from others.
Getting a feeling of value from others leads to a pattern of politics – which will hurt you in the long run. Performance rules over politics in the long run. It is true politics can win in the short term, yet, the political tide always changes in time. When it does and you are on the wrong side – you lose also. The clients we have coached to stay focused upon the performance side (while being politically aware) win at a much highly level over the long term.
In summary, watch out for the dreaded “Being All Things for All People” syndrome. It leads to stress and hard times. Focus upon the important things in your life and stay true to yourself and performance. If you are not sure of where you stand, contact us about our assessments and debrief coaching program.
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